I love quotes. I was thinking about writing about how much Nathan is changing, and I started trying to remember a quote I heard somewhere about change being the only constant in life. I couldn't find that quote, but I found lots of others about change.
If you're in a bad situation, don't worry it'll change. If you're in a good situation, don't worry it'll change. ~John A. Simone, Sr.
Ben and I were talking the other day about how quickly Nathan is changing. He is making new noises and doing new things almost every day. At the beginning of the month, when I started as his nanny, we were not sure that his arm and hand movements were deliberate. He liked to suck his thumb, but only seemed to be able to manage it when he was on his tummy. Now he reaches for things, and brings most of them directly to his mouth. He sucks on his thumbs frequently, especially the left one, no matter what position he is in. At first, when he was lying on his play mat, his arms and hands, waving around randomly, would often hit the giraffe that is hanging above him. Now he reaches for it and pulls it towards him, so he can suck on its feet. For the past few days, when I was giving him his bottle, he grasped the bottle with both hands, and then pulled it out of his mouth, grinned at me, and stuck it back in. He has done if often enough now that I am convinced it is deliberate. In fact, today when he did it, he laughed out loud, as if he was delighted with his own dexterity!
I put a dollar in one of those change machines. Nothing changed. ~George Carlin
Change is inevitable - except from a vending machine. ~Robert C. Gallagher
Those two quotes made me laugh. Of course I have to change Nathan's diaper frequently, which isn't always funny. Yesterday, however, he had a messy diaper. I pulled off the dirty diaper, lifted him up by his ankles so I could stick the clean diaper under him, then started to wipe his butt with a baby wipe. As I was doing it, he finished the job that he had only started in the first diaper, getting my hand, the clean diaper, and his tee shirt all poopy! So changing Nathan made me laugh that time, after I got finished being disgusted of course.
They must often change, who would be constant in happiness or wisdom. ~Confucius
Of course the arrival of a child changes many things for the parents. I hadn't anticipated the things that would change for me, the grandmother.
First of all, Nathan's birth brought up thousands of memories from my pregnancy with Ben. I had lost two babies before Ben was born. The first one I had carried for 26 weeks, and that was four years before Ben came along. So my pregnancy with Ben was a time of hope with a constant background theme of fear. Six weeks before he was due, I ended up in the hospital and thought I might lose him. That was one of the worst days of my life. It turned out that he had dropped and his head had engaged, breaking the amniotic sack abruptly. It sealed itself and I carried him to term with complete bedrest for those final six weeks. It was a scary and emotional time for me. His birth brought more joy than I ever could have imagined.
He was a handsome baby, calm, sweet, clever, curious and able to amuse himself for long periods of time. I had three more miscarriages before Becca was finally born when Ben was almost four years old. When Becca and Seth were little, he was helpful and gentle and loving. I relied on him, and he was dependable. Once he went to school, he suddenly became very independent. It was as if the day kindergarten started, he didn't need me any more. He didn't want to hold my hand in public all of a sudden. I knew it was a part of his growing up, but I didn't like it. From then on he was an independent little person, cooperative and obedient, but aloof somehow, and self-contained.
Nathan's arrival changed my relationship with Ben, and I didn't anticipate that at all. I have always loved him fiercely, and now that Nathan is here, I feel like maybe Ben understands my love in a way he never did before.
When you are through changing, you are through. ~Bruce Barton
Some situations seem never to change. But more often, I think, things are changing frequently around us, and we complain because change requires us to adjust. Certain changes can be very upsetting, especially if it is in a situation where we are comfortable and we do not welcome the change.
There is a certain relief in change, even though it be from bad to worse! As I have often found in travelling in a stagecoach, that it is often a comfort to shift one's position, and be bruised in a new place. ~Washington Irving
Hmmm. I'm not sure if I agree with that concept.
There were lots more quotes, but I guess that is all for now. Nathan's nap times and nap lengths are changing, so I can never be sure how much time I will have to work on this.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Monday, January 19, 2009
Having a Dream
I'm not with Nathan today. In fact, Jen is home with him because of the holiday for Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. I've decided to write about Dr. King. Now I know that this topic is different than most of what will be written in this blog. But, hey, it's my blog and I can put whatever I want into it!
I am fascinated by this year's commeration of King's life and how it led to Obama's inaugeration. The dream has not been fully realized for all Americans yet, but Obama's campaign has opened up the reality of opportunities to thousands of people of color who had the options in the past, but did not understand or believe what they could accomplish. How cool is that! Obama hasn't become president yet, but he has affected the lives of countless kids who now perceive the possibilities in their own futures! But Dr. King was the dreamer who believed that the potential now embodied in Obama would happen sooner than most people thought possible.
I've heard people say that blacks have had equality for years now, since the passage of the EEOC which supposedly guarantees equal rights in the workplace. That was theoretically true, but for children growing up in poverty, in neighborhoods with under-performing schools, it was meaningless. Those children didn't see the possibility of jobs for themselves, and didn't see the relevance of a good education. Their own expectations limited their futures. It is one reason why gangs have become so powerful in poor neighborhoods.
Now many of those same kids see the possibility. There are already kids whose school performance is improving. They never lacked the aptitude, but their defeated attitude held them back. Attitude, after all, is more than half the battle.
Dr. King's plan was thought-out and deliberate, and it worked. It did not bring about an instanteous change everywhere, but it planted the idea, the seed, that grew to fruition in Obama and will continue to grow in all the future American children of every color.
Nathan will see the events of this week as ancient history of course. But he will live in a world different than the one his Grandpa and I grew up in, and even different than the one his own parents grew up in. The world he will take for granted will offer more justice and opportunity for everyone.
I am fascinated by this year's commeration of King's life and how it led to Obama's inaugeration. The dream has not been fully realized for all Americans yet, but Obama's campaign has opened up the reality of opportunities to thousands of people of color who had the options in the past, but did not understand or believe what they could accomplish. How cool is that! Obama hasn't become president yet, but he has affected the lives of countless kids who now perceive the possibilities in their own futures! But Dr. King was the dreamer who believed that the potential now embodied in Obama would happen sooner than most people thought possible.
I've heard people say that blacks have had equality for years now, since the passage of the EEOC which supposedly guarantees equal rights in the workplace. That was theoretically true, but for children growing up in poverty, in neighborhoods with under-performing schools, it was meaningless. Those children didn't see the possibility of jobs for themselves, and didn't see the relevance of a good education. Their own expectations limited their futures. It is one reason why gangs have become so powerful in poor neighborhoods.
Now many of those same kids see the possibility. There are already kids whose school performance is improving. They never lacked the aptitude, but their defeated attitude held them back. Attitude, after all, is more than half the battle.
Dr. King's plan was thought-out and deliberate, and it worked. It did not bring about an instanteous change everywhere, but it planted the idea, the seed, that grew to fruition in Obama and will continue to grow in all the future American children of every color.
Nathan will see the events of this week as ancient history of course. But he will live in a world different than the one his Grandpa and I grew up in, and even different than the one his own parents grew up in. The world he will take for granted will offer more justice and opportunity for everyone.
Friday, January 16, 2009
1st Time Momma and Lovin' It
Hello Everyone. This is Jen's contribution to Nana's Nanny Blog. I am calling it 1st Time Momma and Loving It because that is sooooooo true. Being a mother is amazing and I am loving it. Ben loves being a daddy as well. This coming Sunday we will have been parents for 4 months. Can you believe Nathan is 4 months old already???? We can not!
I need to start this "visitor" blog by saying Thank you to Nathan. He allowed me an easy pregnancy, easy birth, and so far an easy go at Motherhood. From what I have heard, we should not have another child because if the first one is this great, the second one will be a terror. I don't think that will stop us though...eventually.
Nathan is such a great, happy, lovable baby. It is so fun to see him smile and hear him talk. He is exploring new things everyday and loving it. He is so inquisitive, his eyebrows constantly moving and reflecting his thoughts. I was very fortunate to have been able to stay home with him for his first 15 weeks of his life. What a joy it was watching him grow and learn and having been able to spend each and every day with him. However, all good things must come to an end and starting two weeks ago, I have had to leave him to go back to work. What a hard transition. It makes it a little easier knowing that he is in great hands and for the most part, is good with others. I was afraid at first that I had a Momma's Boy on my hands and that he would cry for others the whole time that I was gone. I am very glad to say that is not the case. My being back to work now has me making the most of my evenings and weekends with Nathan...and of course Ben.
I have so much to say and so much love for Nathan but all in due time. I just put him down for the night so that is my que to get ready for bed...take care...until next time. :)
Jen
I need to start this "visitor" blog by saying Thank you to Nathan. He allowed me an easy pregnancy, easy birth, and so far an easy go at Motherhood. From what I have heard, we should not have another child because if the first one is this great, the second one will be a terror. I don't think that will stop us though...eventually.
Nathan is such a great, happy, lovable baby. It is so fun to see him smile and hear him talk. He is exploring new things everyday and loving it. He is so inquisitive, his eyebrows constantly moving and reflecting his thoughts. I was very fortunate to have been able to stay home with him for his first 15 weeks of his life. What a joy it was watching him grow and learn and having been able to spend each and every day with him. However, all good things must come to an end and starting two weeks ago, I have had to leave him to go back to work. What a hard transition. It makes it a little easier knowing that he is in great hands and for the most part, is good with others. I was afraid at first that I had a Momma's Boy on my hands and that he would cry for others the whole time that I was gone. I am very glad to say that is not the case. My being back to work now has me making the most of my evenings and weekends with Nathan...and of course Ben.
I have so much to say and so much love for Nathan but all in due time. I just put him down for the night so that is my que to get ready for bed...take care...until next time. :)
Jen
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Looking Both Ways
Nathan is down for his second nap, after a calm morning. So I have nothing dramatic to blog about.
Driving here this morning, I was thinking about what I would tell him, if I could give him advice and know that he would hear me. I care so much, and I want the best for this adorable child, just like I wanted it for his father and my other two children. But I also know they only half heard less than half of what we said. Some things they ignored, some they twisted to justify what they wanted to do, and some they didn't get so they forget about it quickly. But if I knew Nathan would hear me, and follow my advice, what would I tell him?
Pick up your toys? Wash your hands? Brush your teeth? Be nice? Look both ways before you cross the street?
It's all important stuff. There are natural consequences if these things are ignored.
Especially the one about looking both ways. I thought that while driving earlier. But then I thought that it is not a simple piece of advice. Watching for oncoming traffic is hugely important before stepping into the road, of course. But if I expand the implications a bit, it becomes even more significant.
I mean, looking both ways is important in lots of situations, because it implies being fully informed. It means staying safe by knowing what is coming. And that can really matter in many areas of life.
Our email boxes fill up with forwards containing dire warnings, and then we find out the whole thing was a hoax. We judge people based on first impressions, and then deny ourselves the joy of relationships because of nothing substantial. It is so easy to form an opinion, and dig in and defend it without knowing the other side. (Think about political discussions you had recently, and about how both you and whomever you were speaking to were more determined to be heard than to hear the other person's point of view.)
Checking the truth of information before we share it, getting to know someone inspite of a negative first impression, hearing another person's reasons for their beliefs or opinions - all of these things can enhance our lives. Right? Looking both ways is good in these situations too.
So Nathan, that is Nana's advice for the day. Always look both ways in life.
Driving here this morning, I was thinking about what I would tell him, if I could give him advice and know that he would hear me. I care so much, and I want the best for this adorable child, just like I wanted it for his father and my other two children. But I also know they only half heard less than half of what we said. Some things they ignored, some they twisted to justify what they wanted to do, and some they didn't get so they forget about it quickly. But if I knew Nathan would hear me, and follow my advice, what would I tell him?
Pick up your toys? Wash your hands? Brush your teeth? Be nice? Look both ways before you cross the street?
It's all important stuff. There are natural consequences if these things are ignored.
Especially the one about looking both ways. I thought that while driving earlier. But then I thought that it is not a simple piece of advice. Watching for oncoming traffic is hugely important before stepping into the road, of course. But if I expand the implications a bit, it becomes even more significant.
I mean, looking both ways is important in lots of situations, because it implies being fully informed. It means staying safe by knowing what is coming. And that can really matter in many areas of life.
Our email boxes fill up with forwards containing dire warnings, and then we find out the whole thing was a hoax. We judge people based on first impressions, and then deny ourselves the joy of relationships because of nothing substantial. It is so easy to form an opinion, and dig in and defend it without knowing the other side. (Think about political discussions you had recently, and about how both you and whomever you were speaking to were more determined to be heard than to hear the other person's point of view.)
Checking the truth of information before we share it, getting to know someone inspite of a negative first impression, hearing another person's reasons for their beliefs or opinions - all of these things can enhance our lives. Right? Looking both ways is good in these situations too.
So Nathan, that is Nana's advice for the day. Always look both ways in life.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
When is a blizzard not a blizzard?
Yesterday afternoon they were predicting snow and then windy very cold conditions. Repeatedly I heard reports on the radio and TV weathermen saying we could expect severe cold and blowing snow leading to white out conditions, not so much in the city but in the outlying areas. Ben and Jen live far enough west to be considered an outlying area. Dangerous stuff.
I consulted with them. Ben was supposed to fly to Ohio, but his flight at 8 p.m. was cancelled. He rescheduled to a 7:45 a.m flight. Blizzard conditions were reportedly going to get worse around midnight. They were only predicting about 2 to 4 inches of snow, but all that wind was going to whip it around and make travel "dangerous if not impossible" into the morning hours.
Together we decided that I would spend the night at their house, so I could be here if Ben got to go to Ohio and Jen could go to work. We joked about my husband being stuck home alone, and the three of us stuck here all together with the baby, with no one going anywhere. We decided it could be fun even.
I woke this morning to find an inch and a half of snow on the ground, a blue sky, bitter cold temperatures that were dropping, but no wind. Jen told me Ben had left in the wee small hours, and his flight was expected to be on time. She was ready for work, and Nathan was ready to start his day. The blizzard conditions were postponed or cancelled. More snow predicted later today and overnight.
Good. But how do the forecasters manage to be that wrong, and still get big bucks to do their jobs?
So far, every time I have been with Nathan, he has been sweet and calm and seemingly contented. Today started like that too. He played after Jen left, and I read him two books. When he fussed, I changed him, put him in his crib, patted his back for a few minutes, and he went to sleep. When he woke two hours later, he smiled while I changed him, and then drank his bottle. About half of it.
I burped him, as usual, and everything seemed fine. But when I tried to give him the rest of his milk, he got squirmy, bit the nipple, and didn't really want it. Okay. I sat him up and burped him again. He played with my fingers, and acted like everything was fine. I tried the bottle again. He wasn't interested, so I put him down on his mat to play.
After a few minutes, he started to fuss. I picked him up, changed his diaper, and he squirmed and complained. I tried to burp him again. Then he started to cry. I walked and patted his back, but he kept crying. I tried the bottle again, when he calmed down a bit, but this time he screamed. So I walked him some more, and put him across my knees in case he had some air stuck in his tummy. Becca had colic as an infant, and that position seemed to help her. It didn't help Nathan. He cried. I walked with him, sang to him, showed him his reflection in the mirror, and he cried. I showed him the Mickey Mouse music player he loves, but today he hated it. I tried the duckie that plays music, and he hated that too. He cried for about 25 minutes before he belched loudly, and then relaxed on my shoulder. Within another 5 minutes he fell asleep in my arms.
Which just goes to show that you can't predict what a baby will do any more than you can be sure about the weather!
I consulted with them. Ben was supposed to fly to Ohio, but his flight at 8 p.m. was cancelled. He rescheduled to a 7:45 a.m flight. Blizzard conditions were reportedly going to get worse around midnight. They were only predicting about 2 to 4 inches of snow, but all that wind was going to whip it around and make travel "dangerous if not impossible" into the morning hours.
Together we decided that I would spend the night at their house, so I could be here if Ben got to go to Ohio and Jen could go to work. We joked about my husband being stuck home alone, and the three of us stuck here all together with the baby, with no one going anywhere. We decided it could be fun even.
I woke this morning to find an inch and a half of snow on the ground, a blue sky, bitter cold temperatures that were dropping, but no wind. Jen told me Ben had left in the wee small hours, and his flight was expected to be on time. She was ready for work, and Nathan was ready to start his day. The blizzard conditions were postponed or cancelled. More snow predicted later today and overnight.
Good. But how do the forecasters manage to be that wrong, and still get big bucks to do their jobs?
So far, every time I have been with Nathan, he has been sweet and calm and seemingly contented. Today started like that too. He played after Jen left, and I read him two books. When he fussed, I changed him, put him in his crib, patted his back for a few minutes, and he went to sleep. When he woke two hours later, he smiled while I changed him, and then drank his bottle. About half of it.
I burped him, as usual, and everything seemed fine. But when I tried to give him the rest of his milk, he got squirmy, bit the nipple, and didn't really want it. Okay. I sat him up and burped him again. He played with my fingers, and acted like everything was fine. I tried the bottle again. He wasn't interested, so I put him down on his mat to play.
After a few minutes, he started to fuss. I picked him up, changed his diaper, and he squirmed and complained. I tried to burp him again. Then he started to cry. I walked and patted his back, but he kept crying. I tried the bottle again, when he calmed down a bit, but this time he screamed. So I walked him some more, and put him across my knees in case he had some air stuck in his tummy. Becca had colic as an infant, and that position seemed to help her. It didn't help Nathan. He cried. I walked with him, sang to him, showed him his reflection in the mirror, and he cried. I showed him the Mickey Mouse music player he loves, but today he hated it. I tried the duckie that plays music, and he hated that too. He cried for about 25 minutes before he belched loudly, and then relaxed on my shoulder. Within another 5 minutes he fell asleep in my arms.
Which just goes to show that you can't predict what a baby will do any more than you can be sure about the weather!
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Nathan
Several people told me that being a grandparent was great, because you get to spoil the child and then go home. All the nighttime feedings and doctor visits and worry and aggrevation get left to the parents, and the grandparents get the fun.
Nathan is our first grandchild, the son of our first child, Benjamin. Nathan is 16 weeks old today. Starting this week, I will be his Nana Nanny two or three days a week. Tuesday this week was the first day I spent with Nathan. During the past 16 weeks, I have spent lots of time with him, so Jen could nap or shop or whatever. But that was just for two or three hours at a time. On Tuesday I was with him from 8:30 in the morning until about 4:30 in the afternoon.
Nathan is a calm, sweet baby - a lot like his father was at that age. He is alert and interactive and smiley. I was amazed on Tuesday morning at how long he sat quietly on my lap, looking at cloth books that I read to him. He wasn't sleepy. He was looking, and listening. He has several toys that play snippets of music, and he seems to really like those. He spends a lot of time looking at a mirror over his head on his play mat, and talking to the baby he sees there. He is beginning to reach deliberately for things. When he does grab something, it goes directly to his mouth.
He is starting to "talk" a lot. He has a lot of different noises he makes - too complex to be called "cooing". He mimics facial expressions, raises his eyebrows, smiles, sticks his tongue out, and sometimes laughs out loud.
The fun thing Nathan did on Tuesday was mimic me when I made a raspberry noise at him. He was playing with his tongue, sticking it out and drooling - ah, the awful teething! I had changed his diaper, and he was still on the changing table. He was smiling at me, with his tongue out, so I just stuck my tongue out at him and gave him a raspberry. He did it right back at me, then laughed! I think it was an accident, because I couldn't get him to do it again, but it seemed very deliberate at the time.
Ben and Jen are phenominal parents. Both of them. Their calm, loving parenting is helping Nathan be the calm sweet boy he is.
Today was also a good day with Nathan. He didn't do anything as exciting as a raspberry, but it was a good day anyway.
I told Jen I would journal about Nathan while I'm spending all this time with him. That's what this blog will be. Some other stuff will get thrown in, I'm sure, but mostly it will be about Nathan.
Nathan is our first grandchild, the son of our first child, Benjamin. Nathan is 16 weeks old today. Starting this week, I will be his Nana Nanny two or three days a week. Tuesday this week was the first day I spent with Nathan. During the past 16 weeks, I have spent lots of time with him, so Jen could nap or shop or whatever. But that was just for two or three hours at a time. On Tuesday I was with him from 8:30 in the morning until about 4:30 in the afternoon.
Nathan is a calm, sweet baby - a lot like his father was at that age. He is alert and interactive and smiley. I was amazed on Tuesday morning at how long he sat quietly on my lap, looking at cloth books that I read to him. He wasn't sleepy. He was looking, and listening. He has several toys that play snippets of music, and he seems to really like those. He spends a lot of time looking at a mirror over his head on his play mat, and talking to the baby he sees there. He is beginning to reach deliberately for things. When he does grab something, it goes directly to his mouth.
He is starting to "talk" a lot. He has a lot of different noises he makes - too complex to be called "cooing". He mimics facial expressions, raises his eyebrows, smiles, sticks his tongue out, and sometimes laughs out loud.
The fun thing Nathan did on Tuesday was mimic me when I made a raspberry noise at him. He was playing with his tongue, sticking it out and drooling - ah, the awful teething! I had changed his diaper, and he was still on the changing table. He was smiling at me, with his tongue out, so I just stuck my tongue out at him and gave him a raspberry. He did it right back at me, then laughed! I think it was an accident, because I couldn't get him to do it again, but it seemed very deliberate at the time.
Ben and Jen are phenominal parents. Both of them. Their calm, loving parenting is helping Nathan be the calm sweet boy he is.
Today was also a good day with Nathan. He didn't do anything as exciting as a raspberry, but it was a good day anyway.
I told Jen I would journal about Nathan while I'm spending all this time with him. That's what this blog will be. Some other stuff will get thrown in, I'm sure, but mostly it will be about Nathan.
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